8.23.2007

Last night, I had a dream...

...And it was out in left field.

My Dad was still alive but my Mom had passed away. There are a lot of dreams that are like that. One of them is alive while the other isn't. Or they're both passed away. Never both alive.

Anyway, Andrea, myself, and my Dad stopped at a McDonald's. It was a very busy McDonald's so there were three different lines. I was on the far right hand side. (It was one of those "It was a McDonald's but it wasn't.") So we all order our food, but I see that Andrea and Dad had gotten ice cream. I said to them, " I didn't know I was allowed to get ice cream! " So I scamper back in line. As I'm standing there in line, a guy to the left of me starts convulsions and falls to the floor. I remember in my dream having the music cut in the McDonald's and hearing "gasps". The worst part of the dream, though, is that nobody was helping him. I remember looking around the McDonald's with a look of horror and nobody else's face was like that. So I jump in and help. I prop his head up, start asking him questions, the whole nine, and still nobody helps. By this time Andrea and Dad had come over and they motioned me to get going. So I did. I just got up and left him there.

I know dreams are just that.....dreams. But I truly think that dreams are little windows. They let us see so much! I don't know if I've posted this before in my LJ, but when my Dad died I hit a real low. I didn't do much of anything but sleep. This went on for MONTHS. Aaron somehow managed to stay by my side through the depression (Thanks, Aaron!!!! Love you!!!!!) Anyhoo, I kept on having dreams with my Dad in it. I'm not talking a dream a week ....it was every single night. I'd wake up more sad, more pissed off, more angry than the day before. But one night I had a dream. It changed everything. It was like the flip of depression was switched. It was one of those dreams that I really honestly feel that he came to me and talked to me.

I will remember this dream forever. We were sitting outside on a wrap around deck. It was overlooking a large valley. Green everywhere. Just gorgeous!! It was just as the sun was setting so there was this orange/pink look in the sky. My dad was sitting on the corner of the deck (back facing the valley) and I was sitting down facing the valley. He said to me, " Don't worry, Tianna. Everything is going to be OK. The music up here is wonderful! "

I woke up that next morning a new person.

I guess the whole point of this blog was maybe our dreams are really trying to tell us something. Maybe someone needs my help and I'm failing to recognize it? Should I be trying to find the meaning of my dreams and go out and change/help/do whatever my dreams imply? Perhaps I will go to McDonald's today to get a chocolate shake and maybe, just maybe, I will be able to help someone there.

5 comments:

Andrea said...

Wow, I love you. Seriously. We're all that's left of our unique, fun little family and we always have to keep their spirit alive. Always.

Oh, and while you're at McDonald's will you ask them when they're getting their chicken fajitas back?

Unknown said...

Seriously.

Lori said...

I found myself in a desert called...Cyberland. :)

I am glad you shared your dreams. I heart you.

PS: I had a dream the other night that I was trying to deliver mail with Casey on this old-fashioned train, but I was nervous because I had to get back (where?) in time to helpDenise Sinz with her math homework... then Bon Jovi put on a concert and Larry Reckin got off an airplane on a solid-gold wheelchair like the one Larry Flynt has. I cannot even BEGIN to guess what that one might mean.

Andrea said...

I love that Lori went w/ Rent and not the normal MLK quote everyone would have. You guys are the best!

Andrea said...

Pants.